A few years ago I had the great good fortune of listening to Dr Demartini speak at an event. At the time I had some personal issues that I wanted to sort out, issues that I felt were holding me back in many ways. I was so impressed by what he had to say that I signed up for the ‘Breakthrough Experience’, a 3 day course that he runs. It was one of the hardest weekends of my life but also one of the most life-changing weekends. This was during a period of time where I had a brain-storm (not to be confused with brain-wave…which is usually the precursor to something sensible) and signed up to just about every Personal Development course that was being held in London at that time (2007-2008), 9 months of madness that cost me a ruddy fortune. Subsequent to that period of lunacy, I was left with a serious amount of debt and over a period of time….a healthy respect of Personal Development avoidance.
However, subsequent to that and because this particular course did in fact produce a positive outcome, Dr Demartini’s course was/is the only one I would ever recommend. I signed up to his newsletters and follow his page on facebook. I enjoy reading the information he sends and usually get some real learning out of it. I received this in the mail a few days ago and thought I would share it with you as it is really profound….I hope he doesn’t mind 🙂 ( and in case he reads this (as if) no Dr D I am not putting you on a pedestal….I just really appreciate what you teach! 🙂 )
So here goes:
” The three words ‘I LOVE YOU’ can be for some the most challenging words to say and yet also the most commonly appreciated words for people to hear.
Many people hold back on sharing their love and appreciation for others because of a fear of rejection.
I often ask my clients what they would do if they were told they only had 24 hours to live. In all, if not most cases, they say they would make sure they used their last hours to say ‘Thank you, I love you’ to all of the people they feel contributed towards their lives.
At the core of every human being, we all just want to be loved and appreciated for who we are. So letting someone know that you love them is one of the most precious gifts you can give.
Whether Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, Valentine’s Day or Children’s Day, when it comes to those you love, find a way to share your appreciation and the truth of your heart.
When asked the best way to overcome the fear of saying ‘I love you’, I suggest the following:
Write down 25 benefits to you of your sharing the words ‘I love you’ with the person you wish to share your heart with, and then also write down 25 drawbacks to you of not sharing the words ‘I love you’ with them.
Whenever we see more benefits than drawbacks in an outcome, we take action.
Write down all the things you fear may occur if you say ‘I love you’ and then take each item you listed and ask how it will benefit you if it occurs. Every situation has a balance of support and challenge and no matter what happens you will always experience both sides.
Write down 25 benefits to the person hearing you say you love them and 25 drawbacks for that person if you do not tell them. When you perceive more benefits to them of hearing the truth of your heart you will feel inspired to tell them you love them.
In our daily relationships we swing back and forth between like and dislike, attract and repel, yet are these not the two arms walking hand in hand as one in a balanced gait – truthfully called love.
True love is the synthesis and synchronicity of all complementary emotions – a balance between the attractive and repulsive emotional extremes. It is a pure energy that permeates our entire existence. When applied to a romantic or intimate relationship, true love emerges as you come to appreciate both the positive and negative, good and bad, happy and sad and ups and downs of a relationship. You realise that the purpose of a relationship is not only romance, joy, support and so-called happiness; it is also equally about learning, challenge, growth and personal evolution.
True love is our ultimate objective, whether we’re aware of it or not. We may think we’re looking for something else, something material and fleeting, but even the pursuit of transient goals just leads us back to the truth of love. The purpose of all relationships is to dissolve the barriers that keep us from recognising the love that already is and expressing the love we ultimately are.
Love and wisdom,
Dr John Demartini ”
As I said these are his words, and I have not added or subtracted anything from them, but I have sure gained a lot. Hope you have enjoyed it as much.